Confessions of a Library Loser

I have a bad habit.  Well, actually, I have several, but we'll save the rest for other postings.  I am really, really, REALLY bad about turning in library books on time.  Heck, not even "on time", it's more like, I'm bad about turning in library books within a couple of months after they are due.  I have no excuse for my poor citizenship in this regard, I'm just a lazy, forgetful, procrastinator.  In every town I've lived in, I've had a library card.  I love to read, so this is a necessity.  I always start out with good intentions of returning my books in a timely matter, and I'll do reasonably ok for a while.  By "reasonably ok", I mean that they are only a week or two overdue when I turn them in.  Eventually, though, I get distracted by other, non-library related things, and my slacker-ness escalates to weeks, months, seasons..... I always get the books turned back in at some point, but embarrassed to show my face inside the library, the fines haven't always gotten paid.  I feel so guilty admitting that.  In the times in the past, we've always ended up moving to a new town or state, (not because of that!) where I get to start fresh with an untarnished borrowing record, and a shiny, new library card.  I always screw it up.

This past summer, my kids and I made many visits to our favorite local library.  Like always, the books got turned in roughly around the time they were due for a while, and with me feeling proud of myself for my borrowing responsibility, we'd check out new ones.  This continued until school started, and our routine was disrupted.  The three of us had checked out at least 9 books between us, which got forgotten about for a few......ummmm.....months.  Yeah.  I ignored a few letters from the library, thinking that I'd get the books rounded up and turned back in soon, and then promptly buried my head back in the sand.  (I'm such a jerk.) Eventually, my husband demanded that we locate all the books, and we took them to the library's after hours drop box.  Sweet relief.  Fast forward a couple more months, until this morning.  My husband opened up a very angry letter from the library, threatening terrible things if we do not return the books (what books? I thought we returned them all?!) and pay the overdue fines, OR pay $235 within 30 days.  Two Hundred and Thirty-five Dollars.  Considering that I thought we already turned all of the books in, and I've not seen them around, I may have to give up buying Peppermint Mocha Lattes for quite a while. Let's just say that dear hubby is not very happy with me today. I am very much in the doghouse.  He has told me that I can no longer use my library card.  Normally, I'd argue (or let's face it, ignore) this demand (I'm not so good with being told what to do), but what can I possibly say for myself? I'm a library loser, and I'm ashamed of myself. 

Some women get cut off from their credit cards, and I, my friends, get cut off from my library card. 
There ought to be a 12 step program for being a Library Loser.  I can't seem to help myself-just when I think I've learned my lesson, it happens again, worse than before.  For now, I'm keeping the shades pulled, and the doors locked, in case the angry librarians come looking for me.  I'm sure they'll be armed with barcode scanning guns, and they'll arrest me with book binding tape, and drag me off in the Book Mobile to the stacks, where I'll be imprisoned, forced to alphabetize and memorize the Dewey Decimal System.  They might give me one phone call, but I'll have to whisper, so no one will be able to hear me anyway.  If this happens, please come visit me.  I'll be in the "Bethany" wing of the building.  (You know, the one they built with all of my "contributions"?)

What do I do?

What do I do?
This library book is 42
Years overdue.
I admit that it's mine
But I can't pay the fine--
Should I turn it in
Or hide it again?
What do I do?
What do I do?


By Shel Silverstein

Friday Five

Ok, I think I'm going to call this Friday Five, rather than Friday Favorites, because I have at least 5 things to say, but they aren't exactly favorites this time....soooooo....yeah.  As if you care. Anyhow-same format as last week, just some are favorites, and some are just random related bits.  (Why do I spend so much time explaining what I'm going to talk about before I talk about it? Because I'm a teacher and I'm good at rambling, that's why.)

TV-I was so excited to watch the new episode of 19 Kids and Counting this week! I don't know why I'm so addicted to this show, but I am.  Anyhow, I have to admit that I started bawling during the scene where all of the kids get to meet the new baby in her incubator.  The room was filled with Duggars, but everything was silent, except for all of the older girls sobbing at the sight of their tiny baby sister.  Very touching.

Music-I discovered that my husband likes Weather Channel music.  That was a frightening discovery, let me tell you!  He is seven years older than me, and usually our age difference isn't a big deal, but sometimes our taste in music can be a bit different.  This was one of those times.  We were listening to music from his iPod that he had docked to the stereo.  A jazzy instrumental came on that sounded like the music to the "Local on the 8's" on TWC-I made a crack about it, and he matter of factly commented that TWC does in fact, play this band's music quite often.  Well, of course I couldn't hold myself back from teasing him for the rest of the night.  For example, I'd turn the television to the weather channel, and say "Look honey! It's your favorite music video station! But what's with the geography lesson?"  I also might have brought up how soon I'll be driving him to Denny's for the Early Bird Special.  When he got tired of my jokes, I told him he could just turn his hearing aid down, and then he wouldn't have to listen. He loves me.

Book-Our Connection Group at church is doing a James MacDonald bible study, Gripped By the Greatness of God.  It's a video study with  a workbook.  I'm really enjoying it so far.  The daily workbook devotions are short, but thought provoking.

Movie-Well, I haven't seen it yet, but a friend and I are going to see New Moon tomorrow, if the weather is cooperative.  (I'll have to ask my husband what the forecasts on the Weather Video Channel are saying).  I'm not into vampires-I only read the books after everyone went on and on about how great they were.  Totally not typically my thing, but I read them and liked them well enough, (although I think Edward was a stalker, and Bella was a selfish and manipulative narcisisst, but that's a rant for another day).  Anyhow, I'm really looking forward to going with Jennifer, as she's one of the few people, besides my mother, who doesn't mind that I can't watch a movie like that without making sarcastic comments.  We're hoping that the theater isn't crowded so we can give it the Mystery Science Theater 3000 treatment.

Blog-I love this guy's blog, he cracks me up with his stories: http://www.knuckleheadhumor.com/  He's hilarious, and I especially love the stories that he tells about his childhood.  Check it out!

(Aack! Where did my spell check button disappear to?)